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Let there be humor!
sirslayerr
Member Posts: 128
au.messages.yahoo.com/sports/afl-discussion/128951
Warning: Some of the jokes are Mature, Adult Humor.
Comments
Ok.. I have some bad jokes here... but maybe this post is better in Offtopic... oh well here I go...
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
When a cow laughs, does milk come out it's nose?
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon to the pan?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
What do they use to ship Styrofoam?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
When you choke a smurf, what color do they turn?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
If you shoot a mime, do you have to use a silencer to keep it quiet?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
If a stealth bomber crashes in the forest, does it make a sound?
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
Should vegitarians really eat animal crackers?
Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
Why do people sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" when they're already there?
Why do people say "tuna fish?" They don't say "beef mammal" or "chicken bird!"
What's another word for synonym?
So what's the speed of dark?
Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?
The Second Day Vet
Ok.. I have some bad jokes here... but maybe this post is better in Offtopic... oh well here I go...
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
When a cow laughs, does milk come out it's nose?
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon to the pan?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
What do they use to ship Styrofoam?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
When you choke a smurf, what color do they turn?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
If you shoot a mime, do you have to use a silencer to keep it quiet?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
If a stealth bomber crashes in the forest, does it make a sound?
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
Should vegitarians really eat animal crackers?
Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
Why do people sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" when they're already there?
Why do people say "tuna fish?" They don't say "beef mammal" or "chicken bird!"
What's another word for synonym?
So what's the speed of dark?
Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?
Sooooo... Baad... Can't ....Breath......
You must of saved every christmas cracker joke you read this year and posted them. They are terrible.
Take the Magic: The Gathering 'What Color Are You?' Quiz.
ahhh the cheesiness makes it so delicious
Bollocks!
Haha, give me 30 minutes or so and I'll make a funny video and post it in a new thread.
I giggled at the Bill Clinton joke. Think I heard it before on Jay Leno Show.Ok.. I have some bad jokes here... but maybe this post is better in Offtopic... oh well here I go...
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
When a cow laughs, does milk come out it's nose?
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon to the pan?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
What do they use to ship Styrofoam?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
When you choke a smurf, what color do they turn?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
If you shoot a mime, do you have to use a silencer to keep it quiet?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
If a stealth bomber crashes in the forest, does it make a sound?
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
Should vegitarians really eat animal crackers?
Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
Why do people sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" when they're already there?
Why do people say "tuna fish?" They don't say "beef mammal" or "chicken bird!"
What's another word for synonym?
So what's the speed of dark?
Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?
Sooooo... Baad... Can't ....Breath......
You must of saved every christmas cracker joke you read this year and posted them. They are terrible.
Well ..heh.. I tend to have a little too much time on my hands to sit and come up with those. lol
They are terrible and I love it.
lol... Serious though, I have collected them from all over the internet.
What the heck...here we go...
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is a boxing ring square?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that rain drops down, but snow falls down?
Why is it that to stop Windows 95 or 98, you have to click on "Start"?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavour, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes? Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy booze when you can't drink and drive?
Why isn't there mouse-flavoured cat food?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
The Second Day Vet