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A good read: Complainers of the World Unite
DeserttFoxx
Member UncommonPosts: 2,402
This is a good article found over at Wired.com http://www.wired.com/gadgets/miscellaneous/commentary/alttext/2006/11/72119/
Its pretty funny, Im sure we all fall into some category here.
I would have to say i fall under the power craver.
Complainers of the World Unite
Lore Sjöberg Email 11.15.06
If you play an online game that you enjoy, there's one surefire way to spoil the experience: read the forums on the official site. There you will find a vast underworld of lost souls keening their misery onto your screen. A game you thought was entertaining, well-balanced and attractive will be torn apart before your very eyes and pronounced lacking in every conceivable way.
It doesn't matter that the complainers spend as much time on the game as you do, and probably more. While they may disagree on the nature of the flaws, they are united in agreement that whatever those flaws may be, they are unforgivable.
Herewith then, a guide to the deranged, degraded inhabitants of the forums. You cannot defeat them, they provide precious little experience, but if they get their claws on you, they may turn you into one of their own.
The Power CraverWants only one thing -- more power with less effort. Any downgrade in power is infuriating. Any upgrade is insufficient.
Sample Quote: "I can't believe they nerfed the pillar of lava spell! How am I supposed to kill twelve ogres at once now?"
Punishment: Forced to admit that no matter how powerful in the game, still works as a cashier at Kroger in real life.
The Magical RealistDoesn't understand what a "game" is. Constantly makes arguments based on what would be "realistic," even if the game is set in a fantasy world run by wizards and pixies.
Sample Quote: "You can't tell me a Mondlagarian Tiger Warrior is stronger than a Swamp Troll. That just doesn't make sense!"
Punishment: Sent back to kindergarten for remedial make-believe classes.
The Majority StockholderSeems to believe that $15 a month buys you a seat on the board of directors. Doesn't realize that a hundred thousand other people are ponying up the same amount.
Sample Quote: "I've e-mailed the developers several times telling them that Fire Paladins should have the axe-throwing skill. They haven't changed it, but they're still taking my money!."
Punishment: Forced to work customer service for an online game company.
The EmancipatorSees the game as a titanic struggle between the evil expressive developers and the poor, downtrodden gamers. The evidence? Every rule and limitation in the game.
Sample Quote: "I don't see why I have to complete quests to get epic weapons! If I want my second-level Bumblefur Bard to wield the Deathsword of Arat'rak'k'k'k, that's my right! Quit telling me how to play!"
Punishment: Sent to Sudan to experience first-hand what oppression actually feels like.
The Eternal QuitterJust comes on the forum to let everyone know he's quitting for good and to spend a dozen paragraphs explaining why. Then does it again three months later.
Sample Quote: "For real, this time."
Punishment: Forced to actually quit.
One-Issue PosterOnly has one complaint, but posts about it 15 times a day. This is because nobody else cares.
Sample Quote: "THE LAVENDER STARBELT IS ACTUALLY PERIWINKLE!!!! WHY DON'T THEY FIX THIS??!!!?!"
Punishment: Lavender Starbelt changed to lilac.
The LifestylerWants a bunch of cosmetic changes to a single type of character. Exhibits an eerie level of identification with said character.
Sample Quote: "The Pastry Elves' laugh should be less bubbly and more tinkly. Our giggle should remind you of gazing at the stars as a child, and our smile should make you think of the taste of honey on a cool spring morning."
Punishment: Character icon replaced with accurate photograph of self.
The DeathmongerMain complaint about the game is that you can't kill everything. Secondary complaint is that the things you can kill don't suffer enough.
Sample Quote: "Why can't I make the baker watch me kill his wife and child, then force-feed their flesh to him until his stomach bursts? What is this, Barbie's Horse Adventure?"
Punishment: To be determined, pending DNA analysis of freezer contents.
---
Born helpless, nude and unable to provide for himself, Lore Sjberg eventually overcame these handicaps to become a gadfly, a gadabout and a gadget.
Quotations Those Who make peaceful resolutions impossible, make violent resolutions inevitable. John F. Kennedy
Life... is the shit that happens while you wait for moments that never come - Lester Freeman
Lie to no one. If there 's somebody close to you, you'll ruin it with a lie. If they're a stranger, who the fuck are they you gotta lie to them? - Willy Nelson
Comments
Loved it.
"What is this? Barbie's Horse Adventures?"
Haha! Fun article. I don't know if they covered everything, but they nailed the stereotypes they did cover spot-on.
As a wannabe RP-er and virtual world creator myself, I definitely would be a magical realist more than anything else.
Very funny. I agree, I think there's room for more stereotypes in there.
Ha! Thats funny.
It's missing alot more stereotypes though...
Im not realy fit in one of catagorys, maybe emancipater i dunno?
But its one hell of great story to read:)
And most is oh so true:)
Games played:AC1-Darktide'99-2000-AC2-Darktide/dawnsong2003-2005,Lineage2-2005-2006 and now Darkfall-2009.....
In between WoW few months AoC few months and some f2p also all very short few weeks.
lol.
I've seen so many who fall under "The Magical Realist" that I've lost count.
The Magical Realist
Doesn't understand what a "game" is. Constantly makes arguments based on what would be "realistic," even if the game is set in a fantasy world run by wizards and pixies.
Yeh you have the same kind of people who watch a fantasy movie and say this movie sucks becouse this is not realistic:P
Games played:AC1-Darktide'99-2000-AC2-Darktide/dawnsong2003-2005,Lineage2-2005-2006 and now Darkfall-2009.....
In between WoW few months AoC few months and some f2p also all very short few weeks.
I'm an Emancipator I suppose. But seriously though most of these game developers are being controlled by the "suits" that's the only reasonable explanation for all these lackluster clones we've been seeing
The first mmorpg I ever played was Asheron's call back in early 2000. I never ever used to read forums for games back then. In fact , I thought people who did were idiots. I just played the game and talked with people in-game and that's all.
The first mmorpg I ever played was Asheron's call back in early 2000. I never ever used to read forums for games back then. In fact , I thought people who did were idiots. I just played the game and talked with people in-game and that's all.
First game i played was FF11, i didnt use forums for that either, mainly because there were none, and id otn goot fansites, but now if a game doesnt have an official forum i kind of lose interest in playing it.
Forums attract teh whiners, but it also helps people find help and information and allows GOOD company 2 sides communication with their community.
Quotations Those Who make peaceful resolutions impossible, make violent resolutions inevitable. John F. Kennedy
Life... is the shit that happens while you wait for moments that never come - Lester Freeman
Lie to no one. If there 's somebody close to you, you'll ruin it with a lie. If they're a stranger, who the fuck are they you gotta lie to them? - Willy Nelson
If complainers unite, wouldn't they just complain about each other?
You didnt actually read the thread.. just the title.
Quotations Those Who make peaceful resolutions impossible, make violent resolutions inevitable. John F. Kennedy
Life... is the shit that happens while you wait for moments that never come - Lester Freeman
Lie to no one. If there 's somebody close to you, you'll ruin it with a lie. If they're a stranger, who the fuck are they you gotta lie to them? - Willy Nelson
The Magical Realist
Though I think I've been all of them at some point.
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Talking about SWG much?
ROFL, great article! I usually don't complain about anything, but when I do it's for a few months, every day. :} But I'm mainly a deathmonger, I especially enjoy other players burn.
They forgot an important type though, the type that laughs with complainers, then starts complaining about them! I like laughing with power cravers for example (why do they hate balanced games?).
You know it, the best way to realize your dreams is waking up and start moving, never lose hope and always keep up.
Haha, great read
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In memory of Laura "Taera" Genender. Passed away on Aug/13/08 - Rest In Peace; you will not be forgotten
You didnt actually read the thread.. just the title.
I did, but the title was funny
BTW I think this is what killed many great games, including SWG. I read alot of the complaint posts back when I played, but if it didn't effect me directly I just wrote it off. I think every game has these types who border on being complainers and people who actually care about the game. Best thing to do is just mentally filter out the BS. No game will ever make everyone happy, but if the majority isn't happy (SWG) you have a problem Houston.