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General: Game at Your Own Risk
SBFord
Former Associate EditorMember LegendaryPosts: 33,129
There is no question that MMORPG.com's Coyote Sharptongue casts a laser sight on the gaming world. In today's column, Coyote talks about the various ailments that can befall any one of us as gamers. Check out Dr. Sharptongue's diagnosis and treatment of all that ails you. Let us know what you think!
If you've ever flipped through a gaming manual out of necessity or "I'm in the bathroom with nothing else to read" boredom, you probably only half-noticed the "Please Don't Sue Us" list of warnings that came with the game you just purchased.
Read more Coyote's Howling: Game at Your Own Risk.
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Comments
Lol I think this is starting to be my favorite column. Coyote, just want to say you have a strange, weird sense of humor but I like it. Im pretty sure the musculoskeletal stress injury probably has something to do with kicking your tv or computer when you get killed sometimes, otherwise known as a broke toe or in football terms turf toe, either way it hurts like hell.
Seems we're right up there with russian roulette players.
This really is the funniest column here. Always a few chuckles.
BTW, looking old here but...School House Rock started in the 70's and was revived in the 80's with all the same little helpful cartoons: " A noun is a person, place, or thing!".
Thanks for a good laugh after a long days work :-)
Norden
I am so amused by this column. "Foamy expense" had me choking on my coffee.
"Forums aren't for intelligent discussion; they're for blow-hards with unwavering opinions."
"Mr. Fictious-Example-Of-A-Real-Person-We'll-Without-A-Doubt-See-In-The-Comment-Section"
I think you might have scared them off Coyote. Shame too, I was really looking forward to seeing someone make an ass of themselves. but not to worry! all I need to do is scan enough comment sections...
Oh dear God people, stop telling him he's funny! Coyote is already insufferable. Do you know how he introduces himself? "Hi, I'm Master Humorist Coyote, Sovereign Potentate of Gaming Jokes and Lord of All I Survey"!
He doesn't even know what a potentate is. He just randomly picked an important-sounding title out of the dictionary!
For me it was the "their little neck holes might close up" line.
see? I didn't have to wait long...
JA JA JA!!!
X D
COYOTE RULES!
While the list was very amusing, you chose fictitious examples and left out the real life dangers of excessive gaming. Namely, paleness, fatness, and chronic lack of a girlfriend.
That is why I exercise, get some sun, and chase some women when I am single. After I land one, THEN I go plop down in front of the computer and get pale and fat. You have to prioritize these things to win at life. After we break up then <sigh> it is back to the sun and exercise again.
Currently playing:
Rift
Played:
SWToR, Aion,EQ, Dark Age of Camelot
World of Warcraft, AoC
Yeah Coyote. Get some sun. Jeeze.
This guy is freakin' hilarious.
I was laughing non-stop.
OMG, how funny is that!!! I about fell out of my chair, and it had nothing to do with photo-sensitivity, hehe. I haven't laughed that hard in MONTHS, man... I almost coughed myself to death, there.
Hehehe, This collumn was awsome
what did it say? it's not there i can't find it anymore... come on i want to laugh my butt off
Sonic booms of the pantsular region LMFAOOO, like it's freakin eve or something, LOL this needs to be stickied, I almost busted the veins in my eyes I laughed so hard, sticky sticky sticky
Great article! I laughed out loud.
In regards to the motion sickness, when I first started playing Star Trek Voyager Elite Force I would get motion sick after a 5 or 10 minutes of online play. It felt like I was going to vomit a few times but I never did. I would just stop playing for about 15 minutes or however long it took for the feeling to pass and then start up again. I think a couple times I tried some antinausea medicine but it made me sleepy and I think I probably still felt nauseas. Eventually the feeling passed and when I would hear people complaining about it years later I would just laugh. You have to pay your dues! You play enough and you get over it. Or you don't, I guess.
Playing STVEF for hours a day took its toll on my hands after a couple years. Maybe I'm just prone to arthritis or something, but my hands would stiffen up and hurt. No swelling that I could see though. If I quit for a few days i was good as new. Lately I've been playing APB, but now I'm experiencing the same thing. Hands stiffening up and aching. They also feel really cold, maybe because my hands are so tense. Anyway, it's a fun game but probably not worth wearing my hands out. That's one of the reasons I started playing mmos, easier on the hands.
Coyote, I read this as your "editor" before... but reading it now? I think we need to find you help. No one should be that scared of Schoolhouse Rock.
Great stuff as always, friend.
Try to be excellent to everyone you meet. You never know what someone else has seen or endured.
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you forgot to add "talking to ones self" i do that alot and ive only done it since ive been playing video games. maybe it has something to with the drastic decline in social awareness and activities. i certainly dont get out as much as i used to. gotta reach lvl 80 some how
Great fun, Coyote, but bear in mind that "past time" is all one word. I guess it wasn't a spelling mistake, though, more a slip of that flattened thumb on the space bar ^.^
All hail Coyote! A shear masterpiece of modern literature and all 100% fact checked and proven truth. Honestly one of the funniest pieces i have ever read at mmorpg. Keep up the great work bloke.
This is the best column I ahve ever read on this site. Coyote your the man. Keep up the good work.
I must say, articles like these are one of the only reasons I come to this site anymore, great work
Were all put in the ground one day, why must this dark opera play out this way, sorrow the chord and suffering the melody
No. They avoid that sh*t like the plague because their little neck holes might close up and cause them to die. They don't look at a can of honey roasted nuts and tempt fate, they run from it like it's full of bees, or spiders, or god help us, bee-spiders.
This.
Definitely 2-flat thumbs up.