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*DISCLAIMER*
The OP of this thread urges all thread participants to keep the personal names (and ingame names) of those involved with his/her personal guild drama experiences confidential. This is to prevent any backlash of any form or to be reasonably accused of any form of defamation. The OP of this thread also wishes to provide an avenue of expression for players to post their experiences for the purpose of gaining some measure of closure through writing, and self reflection through writing. Lastly, all personal accounts of such experiences must be treated with dignity and respect as to encourage further personal growth and to foster solace and understanding among the MMORPG.com community.
*DISCLAIMER*
To start this thread off, I will first begin with my own personal dramatic experience which I would describe in a nutshell:
I started playing an MMORPG sometime ago, being carefree and enjoying myself that is until I joined a guild.
I met this female player, X, in the same guild whom I easily had strong feelings for, and I started to give her small little gifts to her, but only to find out later that she had a love interest, Y, and he is the vice leader of the guild.
I knew my personal boundaries in relation to the pursuit of love, never to snatch or steal away someone else's partner, and I was ready to accept the fact that I will never ever have a chance to be in a romantic relationship wih her.
And then, out of the blue, guild drama happened in my guild. The vice leader, Y, wanted to convince the main leader to hand over the main leadership position to him. The main leader refused, and somehow knew that he was conspiring to take the main leadership for himself. I knew nothing of this conspiracy and had no hand in it.
X, whom I had feelings for left the guild, because the "informant" who told the main leader of the conspiracy, also told her that the vice leader also flirted with her romantically. In turn, Y also quit the guild and created a new one with X.
I admitted my feelings to X, and she merely said that her relationhip with Y is just only a friendly one, and that she has strong feelings for me too. So, we begin our relationship, with her being in Y's guild, but I did not join yet.
At first, I didn't want to join Y's new guild. As I've heard there is much negative deeds that he has done that gave him a bad reputation, I did not trust him. Eventually, I joined Y's guild, only to see him openly flirting with X in guild chat. I calmly asked him if he was still together romantically with X. Both me and Y had a calm small talk with nothing serious or disrespectful.
X somehow knew about it, and got extremely upset. I was kicked out of the guild. Most likely by Y. Or even X.
Anyway I managed to reconcile with X after being sincerely apologetic, and I continued my relationship with her.
She confided to me that she just wanted to continue the facade of her being in a romantic relationship with Y. She said that she does not want to hurt him in anyway by admitting that she has no more feelings for him.
She later confided to me that she wanted to leave the new guild she was in with Y. She said that guild life as a vice guild leader was too stressful for her. I wanted her to leave the new guild, not because of my own personal feelings towards it, but because it was causing her much stress to her well being.
However, after 2 months or so, she is still in the guild.
I was terribly upset about the failure of her living up to her words, it pretty much hinted to me that she is not a woman of her own words, who never lives up to her own promises. After all, if you are not honest with anyone, or live up to the promises you keep, it only shows that your sense of truthfulness and honor is questionable. This in turn lead me to be extremely frustrated towards her, but I did my best to keep my cool and treat her like how a lady should be treated.
The turning point in our relationship, was when she sent me an email asking why did I hacked into her personal email account. I was outrageously offended, because that is a crime that I will never ever do to anyone. As much as I was angry, I wanted to prove my innocence to her. The weird thing is that she did not send me any form of proof that I have hacked into her email. After much convincing on my part after a long long talk, I manage to calm our relationship.
I told her that I will be leaving the MMORPG for a month to focus on my real life obligations as I have been spending a little too much time on the game. I have to admit, that she was the main reason why I spent a lot of time ingame.
I came back to the game a month later, and I did not see her online. During the whole one month period, she did not send me any emails or any ingame mails to my character.
The moment I knew our relationship has ended is when I logged into the game and saw her name was announced by a server system annoucement stating that she is happily married to another player. So, I created a new character, and private messaged her offering my congratulations to her. I didn't tell her who I really was. And she replied offering her thanks.
At this point, I have nobody else to blame but myself. Perhaps I could have acted in a much more calmer, mature manner to make things easier for myself and for the people around me. Maybe I had unintentionally cornered some people i knew ingame into a situation that they are desperately wanting to get out off. Maybe it is just a strong dose of bad luck. I may not know the whole story, but I do know for certain that I will keep on walking forward and playing to the best of my ability. Most likely, without me being in a guild.
Whenever you are really bored and don't wanna play an MMO game, go to: http://librivox.org/
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Comments
That is all.
OP: I chuckled at your little soap opera story. While I have no drama to report as it usually starts and ends with me saying time to leave I did have a "guild" situation where our fearless leader was a heavy drinker and would log in drunk out of his skull, do things that made us a target where we didnt need to be one in a game where being a target wasn't always the goal.
Back to your drama, you and your willingness to even participate in the little triangle opens the door to wider audiences in MMOs. Many women would fall all over themselves to participate in that kind of player driven soap opera so while I can't relate, don't ever change.
Please tell me this wasn't the most important part of your life at that time.......Online games of all types will inherantly bring these type of situations to all who play. I'TS A GAME.... Don't get that wraped up into it... Guilds should not be an episode of the rich familys we see today on TV, but as a time when friends can get together reguardless of the outcome... to have fun. In your case it was not a guild as more of a soap opera....
You guys should go on Jerry Springer!
Writing about all the guild drama i've witnessed in all the years would result in a book. Tons of anecdotes as well.
From that chick who had serious personality issues like helplessly breaking out in tears during a bossfight, leaving the raid to phone with her mom for 15mins or untamed sexdrive incl. sending certain sort of pictures of herself to everyone with male voice on the server to that female guild leader who got divorced at age 35 and month later married a 15 year younger nerd from the guild. The wedding party consisted of 1 more member of the guild and in their wedding night they pulled my lvl 11 shaman through the deadmines 5 times until 3 in the morning. The newly husband then said "i'm going to watch TV now, but will be back when there is nothing on. My wife already went to bed".
Besides that, tons of teeny girlies we've had to remove from the guild as they did nothing but stir up trouble and intrigue. Each of those causing her own drama.
Then, in the old times of 40 man old molten core, we had this raidleader who every sunday at 5pm took a shower -and left 39 people waiting after Geddon.
Not everything was drama i admit...but alot of it had to do with curious long distance relationship and jealousy among guys/girls who only knew each other from a single picture and ventrilo, causing guilds to split, couples to part and whatnot.
Locking back i wonder how the heck could i take all this so serious. Good old times. Taught me alot about the people out there...it may sound like a cliché, but alot of the folks i've met in mmorpgs are in fact of the kind who let's say "can't socialize very well in real life for various reasons" and retrieve into games where nerds can be heroes and every chick has an admirer for a few hours a day.
It wasn't. It was really more of an experience that I had that pretty much disarmed me initially from my defences and left me thinking hard about how some players ingame can really spin a huge web of soap-opera-drama for their own purposes.
Whenever you are really bored and don't wanna play an MMO game, go to: http://librivox.org/
Hey hey hey heeeeeeeeeeeyyyyy.......
That OP was like a bad car accident. I know it was horrible to look at, but I just couldn't turn away.
Anyway, in-game romances always end up as bad news. Here is mine:
Player A, a good friend of mine in the guild (not a RL friend that I knew personally), started flirting with Player B, a female player in our guild. They eventually started having an online relationship with each other to the extent they spent a lot of time cybering with each other in game and going into private channels in vent.
Funny story: Our guild leader, Player C, accidentally popped into that private vent channel and immediately heard Player A saying to Player B, "You look like you have some great tits. I'd like to bury my face in them." Now, he was actually just joking around and talking about her in-game avatar that she just made, but Player C heard that and thought he caught them in a moment of vent passion. So he comes back into the officer channel and tells us what he heard, and I excused myself, jumped back down to their channel, and blurted out, "Player A, you motorboatin' son of a bitch you!"
Anyway, here is where this story takes a tragic turn. At some point shortly after that, Player B meets a guy in RL and starts dating him, not letting him know about Player A. But she still continues to carry on her online relationship with Player A, even to the point of Player A being invited to take a vacation to where Player B lives for a week. Anyway, long story/short...Player A spent a week with Player B at her apartment, fell head over heals in love, and eventually found out that Player B had a RL boyfriend and wasn't willing go give him up for Player A. So Player A quits the game entirely and exits the story.
Now, some time later, Player B is dumped by her RL boyfriend, who continuously cheats on her. She eventually starts having an in-game relationship with Player C, our guild leader. Player C is a great guild leader, and made us one of the most successful guilds in the game, but once Player B got her hooks into him, he became hopelessly whipped. He stopped organizing raids, started showing a lot of favortism to Player B, and the guild began to fall apart. The officers had a sit-down meeting with him and I explained to him the issues we were having with what was going on and what was happening to the guild. It had grown far too large, and the veteran raiders in the guild were having to give up raid spots to people who weren't raid-ready as of yet. Meanwhile, Player B was always getting any raid spot she wanted and was turning into the de facto guild leader when Player C wasn't around. The guild was going to shit, and Player C's only concern was cybering with Player B. Basically, he was turning into Player A all over again.
Eventually, we found out that Player C was planning on leaving the game altogether and Player B was going to move across country to live with him. So the officers left in our guild decided to recruit the veteran players and form a smaller, hardcore, progression raid guild with the people that we've been playing with the longest. Shortly after, Player B moved in with Player C, ended up dumping him for another ex-boyfriend who lived in that part of the country, and we've never heard from either again.
Coincidentally, we named our new guild, "PlayerBKilledOurGuild."
A lot of truth to that. But I might add that it are also people that want to socialize and mmorpg's give them the means.
Somehow the anonimity of playing mmorpgs serves as a magnifying glass for personalities; it can bring out the best but also the worst in people.
My brand new bloggity blog.
EQ1, Silver ______ guild *retracted*
Summer of 2001 when the world still seemed cheerful.
UNTIL..
Roommate dating other roommate gets a new computer on our door. Roommate 1 girl, Roommate 2 a dude.
We're all finally running around Velious' dangerous content doing our explore, find something hard to kill, then kill it routine.
Roommate 1 leaves to visit parents. Takes an unusual amount of items. This happens two more times and then finally we get 2 months of rent and a letter, Roommate 1 had been visiting our guild leader for "epic encounters" all of their own. He bought her a new computer to enjoy the content on.
That went on until after 9/11 happened, everything sucked for many of us, and then she showed back up to Roommate 2's new house. (I moved back to my parents, hey it happens.)
They joined the army together, got married, paid off their student loans, she cheated on him TWO more times in Europe and he finally had enough.
I can't believe it's like a decade later. He married a cool chick from Denmark eventually, they have a fat faced lil' boy and they both merrily play WoW together.
So yeah.. This split the Silver _______ into like 4 guilds by the time Planes of Power came about and no one trusted anyone. Particularly me, because I had my buttons rigged so everytime I did a backstab with my rogue I also hit Disarm and Pick Pocket and I'd always deny taking more than my fair share of plat and loot.
I miss those days.
I used to play MMOs like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee.
I do believe this is the quintessential example of how sexual attraction coupled with a lack of fairness and ethics could ruin a guild.
Whenever you are really bored and don't wanna play an MMO game, go to: http://librivox.org/
Hey hey hey heeeeeeeeeeeyyyyy.......
When I was still rolling a Level 80 Warrior on Shattered Halls, we have a big shakeup in our guild. Then suddenly, our guild leader went on a business trip and never came back. We suspected they sold their account and/or was a gold farmer. It was the equivalent of Nelson on The Simpsons and his dad who went for a pack of cigs and never came back haha.
I am the calmer of storms in any guild I have joined. In smaller world f2p MMORPGS, I have been the go-between man for guild and guild talk. I hate MMORPG drama lol. Too many people take gameplay way too seriously.
I have never admired chicks on MMORPG, I just talk, play, and be friends with them. They seem to go through these "admirers" every couple weeks, and I'm always there to here the stories lol...
The major point here is that YOU can bring out the best and worst in people, by how you communicate and spend time with them. I've made friends with all of the worse PvP gankers, the crazy Hitler guild leaders, the hardcore/elites who push their agenda on others, all of the super-duper carebears and everyone else.
Wow..... >.>
My theme song.
I was apart of a guild (Linkshell) in FFXI for a very long time. We were all pretty close friends, talking on ventrilo and all that good stuff. One year we all decided it would be kinda cool to meet up at E3, since I had a ticket already and a few other guys/gals had tickets as well. Once we all arrived and met up things went smoothly. My guild leader we will call him X brought his girlfriend who wasn't a huge gamer or MMO player, but would casually log in every now and again. They hadn't been dating for very long.
When the day was over we all went back to our hotel rooms. Throughout the day I was flirting with the leaders girlfriend. It was playful nothing serious. It was just like how I would do in game when she came on. Apparently she took it seriously and came knocking at my door. She asked if she could come in and talk because she and X got into an arguement over something trivial. I said sure obviously and we sat and talked for awhile. It was awkward at first for me any way since I barely knew the girl aside from ingame.
I tryed to lighten and cheer her up by my casual flirt and jokes but like I said she took it serious. One thing led to another. Soon after all this transpired X came knocking on my door looking for her. I lied and told him I hadn't seen her (while she was still in the room) and told him I was sorry I couldn't help. About an hour later when she was gonna leave and go back to her room as she opened the door, X was around the corner waiting. Apparently he KNEW she was in the room with me and just wanted to bee 100% certain.
We will just say the event didnt go very well for the remainder. I was happy though we are now happily married for 3 years. Unfortunately the LS/guild split and me and her both stopped playing and joined another game. I still feel extremely bad for X he was a good guy and didnt deserve what happend to him.
"In the immediate future, we have this one, and then weve got another one that is actually going to be so were going to have, what we want to do, is in January, what were targeting to do, this may or may not happen, so you cant hold me to it. But what were targeting to do, is have a fun anniversary to the Ilum shenanigans that happened. An alien race might invade, and they might crash into Ilum and there might be some new activities that happen on the planet." ~Gabe Amatangelo
Women, the Yokos of guild relations.
I used to play MMOs like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee.
A random comment in the local chat box had me laughing my backside off. We struck up a convo, teamed up with each other a few times and thought, "Let's form a band!... er Guild!" We were both Druids in WoW. We each had other players we had met and enjoyed the company of and wanted to make an all Druid guild. All the trinity is covered with Druids
A few months later, Cata came out and destroyed the guild concept. Who wants to be in a gimped guild? Getting guild levels and perks based on guild class variety kinda kicked that idea to the curb
The "in guild drama" almost always surrounded girl players (in my experience), whether they instigated it, or were the victims in it. I am now a member of the "He-man Woman-hater Club." Don't get me wrong, I enjoy playing with girls/women, but too many guys and gals think this is a love line or something. I'll gladly group and team with women, but being in a guild with them is just a bomb waiting to explode. Personally, I don't play MMOs to pick up chicks and won't tolerate it from others because I have rarely, if ever, seen it work out for the better. I make a quick exit if I see anything like that happening. I am VERY anti-drama. Zero tolerance. Don't need it in real life, let alone a game.
- Al
Personally the only modern MMORPG trend that annoys me is the idea that MMOs need to be designed in a way to attract people who don't actually like MMOs. Which to me makes about as much sense as someone trying to figure out a way to get vegetarians to eat at their steakhouse.- FARGIN_WAR
When doing progression in wow, heroic toc if i recall correctly, we told everyone "You need to do x dps to come to the fight, it's really easy buy everyone has to do at least x for us to kill it" I honestly can't recall what it was, i'll say 6000 because that sounds familar, but it's been so long i can't recall for sure.
We had a tank in the guild, and he would have been tank 5 or something, more than we needed, he was also the worst tank we had. So, we didn't have an ele shaman, and told him we would give him a shot if he rerolled one. He did, and got to 80, but was also terrible at ele shaman.
When i informed him he wasn't in the raid for that night, he openly cried in vent, he was a 30 something year old man.
We killed whatever boss it was (first boss maybe?) everyone gets gear so dps isn't an issue anymore, were working on heroic faction champs. We bring ele shaman, after going through the cc assignments, he decideds to drop his fire elemental in the middle of all the cced guys.
...
He was a winner.
/thread, seriously, /thread
I don't have any stories, personally, because my cursor hovers over the "leave guild" button at the first sign of crazy.
Writer / Musician / Game Designer
Now Playing: Skyrim, Wurm Online, Tropico 4
Waiting On: GW2, TSW, Archeage, The Rapture
I just found this online article about a female gamer's dramatic player experience on Star Trek online:
Source: http://www.whatmmorpg.com/articles/federation-no-longer-seeking-drama-queens.php
Whenever you are really bored and don't wanna play an MMO game, go to: http://librivox.org/
Hey hey hey heeeeeeeeeeeyyyyy.......
-spam- should have payed more attention to ops post
I used to be a GL for a guild in WoW, I had this new "girl" character join the guild and "she" got somewhat chummy with me.
We didn't have vent so everything was text at that time. (yah a long time ago)
One night we were doing a quest together and "she" started saying stuff, sexual stuff - and I said to "her" wtf are you doing?
And "she" goes well I thought we could have some fun...
I said... why? You're a guy... and he/she goes "no I'm not..." and I said yes you are and I know it.
And he/she said how?
And I said no chick says shit like that, only dudes talk about sex like that, so knock it off.
I was pissed - how gay would have I felt cybering with some dude pretending to be a chick?
I kicked him out of the guild.
I hate guys who play female characters in games, cause now everytime I meet one - I think of that guy.
and the possible cause of the announcement could be?
Do you think that its a possibility that she made that up to get rid of someone who takes something online seriously?
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tldr, but why did you make out with a dude, call him a slur, and then boot him out of your love life? That's a pretty dick move.
I used to play MMOs like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee.
But then again, I wouldn't truly know now. It's over, and I absolutely refuse to even associate myself with her again.
Therefore, i conclude that people who choose to act maturely or seem to be mature, aren't necessarily truly mature in thought, life's experiences and personal philosophy.
Well, sometimes limitations in technology does hinder some online relationships at that time, so........
Whenever you are really bored and don't wanna play an MMO game, go to: http://librivox.org/
Hey hey hey heeeeeeeeeeeyyyyy.......