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People Are Anti-Social
MirariMirari
Member UncommonPosts: 47
The reason why I stuck with MMORPG gaming is so that I can be surrounded by people I could be friends with anyday at anytime.
But lately nobody even says "Hi" anymore, they just run off. Whenever I try to join a party and tag along, they kick me. Most people already have their friends all together in a guild and skype. One time I joined a party and the party leader didn't say anything. Then his mentor joined in and said "Kick this hoe and let's go" so he did exactly what he said. (I still laughed cause it rhymed)
On Dragon Nest the level cap has been raised but I can't find myself soloing to level up, it's much more enjoyable with other people. Even if I have some online friends they pass up on a dungeon with me because they are already settled up elsewhere.
My friends play some games with me but not the games I enjoy most, it is just usually personal preference but it's alot of fun when we start up a MMO PvP type sorts, but they are like: "STOP, NO MORE MMO's" because I annoy them alot about downloading this or that, it's true I admit, I knew I was annoying them but I can't help myself. I hate playing MMORPG's by myself, it is Massively Multiplayer, soloing isn't exactly the thing you should be doing.
I'm an only child so I don't get to play with siblings, on top of that I live far away from my family, over seas actually, and the family I have around in the US are young or just don't even have intrest in what I like. Gaming is my way to get over the stress I have, my family want's me to be with them but I can't exactly talk or do anything I do normally. Whenever I'm not doing anything I get lost in thought about regrets and mistakes, that's why I like to sit on tumblr, or youtube, I've been slowly decending away from my favorite thing to do, gaming. I can't afford normal games, that's why I turn to the F2P MMORPG's they can be way better than what you pay for.
I really don't know what to put here.
Comments
rpg/mmorg history: Dun Darach>Bloodwych>Bards Tale 1-3>Eye of the beholder > Might and Magic 2,3,5 > FFVII> Baldur's Gate 1, 2 > Planescape Torment >Morrowind > WOW > oblivion > LOTR > Guild Wars (1900hrs elementalist) Vanguard. > GW2(1000 elementalist), Wildstar
Now playing GW2, AOW 3, ESO, LOTR, Elite D
It sounds like your own personal anti-social anxieties have creeped in to your online social experiences. People are less patient and polite online; if you have trouble making friends and finding things in common with other people in RL you are going to feel the same tenfold while online.
I didn't want to hear this when I was younger but here is some good advice: you said that "gaming is your favorite thing to do." CHANGE THAT. Make new goals in life that will help address these regrets and mistakes you have made in the past. Make your priority doing things to work towards those goals. Tell yourself that those new things are your NEW favorite things to do.
Gaming should only be a hobby.
Thanks for that, but uh, gaming shall be my favorite thing to do, I plan to drop it (not completely) when I move on into high school, since I'm really setting my sights quite high.
I really don't know what to put here.
People aren't anti-social, they are only social among people with whom they share something in common. Saying "hi" isn't being social, that's extremely shallow. There was a time in MMOs when you could count on having something in common with almost everyone in the game, today, that's not the case, that's why most people don't talk to anyone else, they almost certainly have nothing in common with them.
That's something people have to get through their heads, it isn't going to change.
Played: UO, EQ, WoW, DDO, SWG, AO, CoH, EvE, TR, AoC, GW, GA, Aion, Allods, lots more
Relatively Recently (Re)Played: HL2 (all), Halo (PC, all), Batman:AA; AC, ME, BS, DA, FO3, DS, Doom (all), LFD1&2, KOTOR, Portal 1&2, Blink, Elder Scrolls (all), lots more
Now Playing: None
Hope: None
I'm really into close relationships, so I stick with small guilds.
They all died off in the end though. I got in a major fight with my Guild Master and everything went spiraling down.
I really don't know what to put here.
Very True
I really don't know what to put here.
True. A lot of people can be anti-social (or socially awkward). But, not everyone.
Here's a shortened version of an old story my dad once told me. Maybe it comes out of another old tale like the Arabian Nights or something, but I don't know.
A trader was wandering across the desert and came to the gates of a city. He approaches the guard of the city and says, "I've been travelling for a long time. I think I'm ready to settle down for a while. How are the people in this city?"
"Before I say more, I'd like to know how the people were in the last city you came from," responds the guard.
"They were rude, pushy, selfish, and unpleasant."
"I see," says the guard. "I think you will find the people in this city the same way. I suggest you continue on you journey." So the trader left.
Some time later, another traveler approached the guard and asked the same question. And the guard responded as he had earlier, asking the second traveler about the city he had left before. The traveler said, "I found the people quite kind and civil. In fact, most people were very friendly and helpful."
The guard said, "I think you will find people here much the same. You may enter the city."
========================
In the end, if you have some unpleasant experiences, just ignore those people and move on. There are plenty of nice people out there.
You have friends. It sounds like you are facing a choice between being with friends you like and being with a game you like. Before getting too frustrated at other people for being anti-social, you might want to just carefully double-check this decision right here.
Theres alot of history between my friend's and I so I'd definetly choose my friends over games.
I've had alot of emotional issues lately and small tiny outbursts of fighting with 1 particular friend.
I really don't know what to put here.
...Too long (my post). Let's make it short and simple... (Yeah, this!)
"Why spend time with strangers? They could simply not be there tomorrow..." The end.
...
Ugh.. Hate telling what others are already aware of, but: only people you meet outside of the game that matters, remember that.
They must be "old" and frustrated. Friend lists full of offline players, etc... Y'know.
People start new games with friends they already have, and not with the idea that they will join a game and make friends. They may even be playing the game by themselves, but socializing with friends in different games over things like Facebook, Twitter or Skype. The idea of joining an MMORPG and making friends is probably not high on their list of priorities.
This isn't the fault of game developers. The internet might have been the next big thing way back when, but it wasn't ubiquitous like it is now. Cell phones certainly weren't as prevalent as they are now and nobody really thought of Smart Phones as a thing back then. MMORPGs used to be unique; a social environment for gamers. Now MMORPGs aren't really that unique, and the tools they provide fall far short of what's available with even one of the more basic smart phones available today.
I would say it's time to adapt and move on, both for players and developers. If developers don't figure out how to incorporate things that currently exist outside of the game into the game, the types of social connections that used to happen will become even more rare. Players need to adapt to the idea that they may not get their social fix from MMORPGs. It may be sad, but I don't see MMORPG developers putting millions of dollars into social networks when they can barely get enough money to finish their games.
I can not remember winning or losing a single debate on the internet.
Yep yep, but I do hate seeing everyone offline.
I really don't know what to put here.
It's hard to find emotional support from random anonymous strangers. The world is sort of a FFA PvP game when it comes to such things.
Others are providing better advice than I can - I tend to escape off into games rather than seek out connections, so I'm not really part of the solution.
Actually that 1 particular friend is my friend in real, and we have played Dragon Nest for an entire year together so...
I really don't know what to put here.
I got a lot of crap from other players while tanking MMOs, what I done is turn off the party chat. I know what I'm doing therefore I don't care what the QQer's say.
It's easy to be rude online because we all know we're "safe" or feel safe. How ever it doesn't mean the person has the right to do that, they don't. If they are caught doing it a lot they're done for either by media, courts or by the victim. Most people lack the IQ to be respectful to people and be social.
Sounds like a rude couple of fools to say something like, "kick this hoe and let's go." But i would guess they assumed a man was behind your avatar. Good luck and don't sweat the small stuff. Gaming is rough nowadays so I have simply abstained from it.
Luckily, i don't need you to like me to enjoy video games. -nariusseldon.
In F2P I think it's more a case of the game's trying to play the player's. -laserit
Agreed. All though that quote cracked me up quite a bit.
I really don't know what to put here.
it's not the people but the games that are anti-social.
here a list of thing i think make mmorpg anti-social:
1.auto-group: make interaction between player almost useless
2. when low lvl are totally useless to high lvl
3. no fear of death
4.too much solo content
5.make game for casual gamer that don't have time to play
6.lack of role
7.fast and easy content
nah .. you confuse about the chicken and the egg.
If people don't like solo, and auto-group, they won't be so popular, and the market won't make them standard features.
exactly why we gotta up the drama with some role-play xD
I really don't know what to put here.
And i don't play games to make friends.
In fact, i am one of those anti-social (in games, mind you, not in rl) people.
have you spent any time thinking about why this occurred? It's alway tempting to think that *I* am never in the wrong, I guess it's only with age that you realise that you sometimes say dumb things, start arguments etc. Or perhaps I'm a unique individual that is the only one that makes mistakes
I sometimes make spelling and grammar errors but I don't pretend it's because I'm using a phone
If you want your opinion to actually contribute to the discussion, you should probably explain why for each of these.
I understand whileoak21's list perfectly. I don't need to know "why", to me the whys are obvious.
add one more to the list:
7. huge generational gaps of what is considered socially acceptable behavior amongst Players. MMOs now have Old vs. Middle Age vs. Young Adult vs. Teenage vs. Child. AAA MMOs can not possible bridge all these gaps and I think this alone leads to some of the perceived anti-social behavior.
e.g. I am over 50 now. What I consider to be acceptable "friendly and polite Player behavior" is not what a 18 year Guild Leader would consider acceptable or even what a twenty-something Gamer would consider OK. Too much has changed over time in real life society. Example: Smack Talk. Accepted for almost twenty years now, but to me I am still ove rth persuasion that thinks Smack Talk should be a real life Ticket Offense like Disorderly Conduct. I remember in MMO Gaming Players getting kicked out of the Guild I was in because they Smack Talked and irritated someone. I felt the offense warranted the punishment, and still do. Now SmackTalk is not only accepted, you can't even be taken seriously without it.
THIS gap is why I no longer join Guilds in MMOs. What Young People think is OK isn't even in the same galaxy as what I think is OK.... and it leads to misunderstandings and bad relations in a Guild.
That anti-social Player that never talks or joins groups may just be playing their own game and trying to stay out of everyone else's way... because their social rules are too old to fit with the Young People and they are now too slow to keep up with Younger Gamers speed racing thru dungeons and missions...
and because we don't want to be considered a pedophile or other because of our age. It's potentially too dangerous now. Better to err on the side of caution and just be "anti-social" by not interacting.
Of course I could quit MMO Gaming.... but I am still enjoying it, even as I do it now, so why should I?