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Fare Thee Well, My Beloved
wondersmith
Member UncommonPosts: 27
Link to video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqqmE_6AL-Q
The woman I have dearly loved for the last 12 years suddenly passed away on May 1, 2015. In her memory, I have posted the video valentine I created for her in 2011 using screenshots of us in LotRO, which we spent countless joyous hours playing. As you can see, she mostly played Hobbits and I played Men.
In all those years, talking and playing three hours together every night, we never once traveled the 2,000 miles separating us to meet in real life. Yet surely many couples living together never experience the kind of happiness we shared in our adventures and explorations.
I believe that you, my fellow MMORPG players, are best able to empathize with my love and my loss. Your words of sympathy and tales of your own great loves for other players would be deeply appreciated. I would also be grateful if you would share my video far and wide; I want the world to appreciate that online loves are real and meaningful, and to know of my beloved—that she lived and breathed and mattered. Thank you in advance.
Heartfelt thanks also to J.R.R. Tolkien for imagining the beautiful world we shared, and to Turbine for bringing it to glorious life. Additional thanks to the developers of other games we played, including EverQuest (where we first met), Guild Wars, World of Warcraft, Atlantica Online, Perfect World, Voyage Century Online, Age of Conan, Star Wars: The Old Republic, Neverwinter, and Rift.
I will always love you, Deborah.
—Blake Linton Wilfong aka wondersmith
Comments
OMG .. I am so so sorry for your loss, and I cannot begin to imagine what I would do or feel if I am in your shoes.
To you and Deborah... 4ever
Sz
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I don't know what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't this. Manly tears have been shed. I'm very sorry for your loss. Heart forth, however, knowing that you had was true.
There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self. - Ernest Hemingway
I am sorry for your loss.
But honestly I just have never gotten how people can connect online and get so attached. I am sure she was your friend and that you will miss playing and chatting with her, sucks that she passed away.
I self identify as a monkey.
So sorry for your loss.
-`-,------------------
[mod edit]
As for the OP, I am sorry for your loss, losing someone close is always hard, but it is also an affirmation for the ones left behind to remember to live their lives to the fullest while we still can.
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I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope you can find some peace soon.
Undercover Angel
"I know my mind is
Taken over by this satellite
In the land of cloud
Where you fell from
An angel thats what you are
But this shining flower
Knows it can sting"
Originally posted by laokoko
"if you want to be a game designer, you should sell your house and fund your game. Since if you won't even fund your own game, no one will".
GANDALF: End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.
PIPPIN: What? Gandalf? See what?
GANDALF: White shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise.
PIPPIN: Well, that isn't so bad.
GANDALF: No. No, it isn't.
Im very sorry for your loss, but there is always some light even in the darkest hour.
I remember when i was playing Everquest, i met two person that started a relation online, a little bit like you. they were in Highpass, there was a battle at the gnoll side and the guys looted the tomahawk, i dont remember the name of that tomahaw it was the rare drop i believe, and he decide to give it to her.. its a long time ago and i still remember it.. ! great things happens online.
Loving someone intimately from 2000 miles away does indeed sound like a somewhat new phenomena or atleast was a phenomena that is ever increasingly likely to become more common. That said death is nothing new and although most of us still struggling with dealing with it, it doesn’t change the past.
You say you want her life to have meant something but the time you shared and enjoyed together is not diminished by the removal of her presence. Infact it is probably painfully heightened because you long for more of it.
Bless you for being human, I hope that you cross an even more inconceivable barrier and meet your loved one again and in the mean time I wish you a long and happy life in which you are able to treasure the past rather than be tortured by it. Time heals all wounds.
Thank you for the beautiful quote from the film version of The Return of the King. My beloved Deborah loved the countryside, and would have been gladdened to travel onward to such a place.
In the books, this was the narrator's description of Valinor, the Undying Lands, as Frodo approached them by ship at the end of the trilogy. Those same words could make a lovely ending to LotRO's epic storyline someday.
Thank you again.
Ozmono, thank you for your deeply insightful and compassionate post. Here are my thoughts on what you said, paragraph by paragraph:
Yes, out of millennia of human history, MMORPGs--and the long-distance loves they make possible--have existed for only a couple of decades. Indeed, my beloved Deborah and I were among the forerunners, having met before WoW brought millions of players to the genre. But while you are correct that death is nothing new, I suspect that my suffering is intensified by the intrinsically platonic nature of our relationship. The real world and everything in it seems crude and crass to me now, compared to the beautiful meeting of souls we shared. (On the other hand, maybe everyone feels that way about the part of their love that goes beyond the physical?)
Like you, many people have advised me to treasure my memories of Deborah, and I do take comfort in the thought that I'll always have those memories. Indeed, the fact that those memories center around MMORPGs is an advantage, since many of them are preserved in the countless screenshots I took over the years, and even a few hours of video footage I recorded. But out of the hundred or so condolences I've received, yours is the first to recognize that the memories are actually painful right now because I know there will never be more of them. You understand my situation exactly.
And again you hit the nail on the head: My last words to Deborah, spoken through a phone held to her ear by her daughter at her deathbed, were, "My love, I know you believe in reincarnation. If you're right, perhaps we will meet again someday." She often said the real world was like an MMORPG; that when we finish playing one game, we move on to another. Meanwhile, I believe you are correct that time heals all wounds. I will get past this, eventually.
Thank you again, Ozmono. Your exceptional empathy for my feelings is a comfort to me.
Looking for a family that you can game with for life? Check out Grievance at https://www.grievancegaming.org !
Our own story also began with generosity: I met my beloved in Everfrost Peaks, where my best friend and I (barbarian warrior and shaman, respectively) were hanging around the south tower killing snow orcs for their wrath orc wristbands. A Vah Shir shaman--one of those cat-people from the moon Luclin--came over and asked if she could join our group. She was so cute running around carrying her little club, we couldn't refuse. Later, when it was quitting time, I suggested that she accompany us back to Halas, where we planned to turn in our wrath orc wristbands to a quest NPC for some major experience. If she remained grouped with us, a third of that experience would go to her. We'd collected many of the wristbands before she grouped with us, but we were willing to share experience from all of them with her. Our generosity impressed her, and she asked if she could add us to her friends list. Over time, she and I became inseparable, eventually declaring our love for each other in the Plane of Tranquility. We duoed together in many MMORPGs over the years.
Heartfelt thanks for your sympathy and kind words.
My sincere condolences.
It is sad to hear this. May you find comfort in your memories.
If you are interested in making a MMO maybe visit my page to get a free open source engine.