Blizzard CEO today has stated that he has just signed over all rights to the mega-popular "World of Warcraft" mmorpg. The new owners will be Limitless Horizons Inc, previous makers of the disappointing "Mourning" franchise. Limitless Horizons CEO is extremely excited about the deal, stating that he plans to immediately take down all World of Warcraft servers the first week of June to change the game engine to incorporate previous Mourning game code that will give World of Warcraft characters a new bloodline. After playing for 500 hours, or reaching a random level between 45 and 65 (the max level) the character will DIE, and a newborn character will be born with 50-60% of the dead characters skills and traits.
Limitless Horizons is more then excited to take over the World of Warcraft servers and franchise. They are also excited to finally have the chance to incorporate their new "bloodline" feature that was previously promised for Mourning.
Because of the new coding and changes to the game engine, World of Warcraft will be down for about a month and will reopen on July 1. They will take pre-orders for the new game that all players must buy and download to play. They will give all current players with current subscriptions when they take the client down a 40% discount to $29.95. All other WoW players will need to purchase the new client from Limitless Horizons for $49.95.
Limitless Horizons David Jasinski also says that he is more then excited and knows that the fans will be as well that the current name of the game will be permanently changed to "World Of Mourning" effective July 1, 2006. He states that "warcraft" is a bad word for the title of any mmorpg, and it will be much more of a household name as "World of Mourning" because most people associate the word "warcraft" with the devil and evil. Now he expects the name change alone to result in about a 20-30% increase in the current subscriber base of just over 6.5 million subscribers.
Blizzard now says that they will take the money profited from WoW and start making Twinkies after buying the rights to Twinkies from Hostess. They said they were previously making Twinkies out of every person that sat in front of their computer playing WoW for hours upon hours every day and now they will just being making the twinkies more directly instead of so indirectly as they were before.
Comments
- Zaxx
----ITS A TRAP!!!----
- Zaxx
I agree this was rather funny!
Especially that, IF such a thing would happen, Limitless would prolly react in such a way, just like Sigil would prolly remove all instancing!
- "If I understand you well, you are telling me until next time. " - Ren
Don't be terrorized! You're more likely to die of a car accident, drowning, fire, or murder! More people die every year from prescription drugs than terrorism LOL!
Currently Playing: Dungeons and Dragons Online.
Sig image Pending
Still in: A couple Betas
- Zaxx
Dude, I know. Anyone Warcraft fan would know this is fake from the title. It's pretty funny though. I compliment it.
OMG laser gun pew pew pew
... In before the lock!! Yay!
[ post count statistic obtains +1 ! ]... WooT!!
- Zaxx
APRIL FOOLS!!!!
(only 2 months late)
-------------------------------------------
Steelarm, Doctor of MMO gaming, ethics, and ideas.
I thought SOE bought the rights to WoW?
o_0
"If you want a picture of the future, imagine a robot foot stomping on a human face -- forever."
lol..you gotta admit.. that would be friggin funny just to see the forums go apeshit over that soap oprah
"If you want a picture of the future, imagine a robot foot stomping on a human face -- forever."
http://www.TheGamersAssociation.com
Uh, perfect picture there for you/of you dude. "No thoughts, Head
Empty". Now if you knew anything about Limitless Horizons or Mourning
instead of having your head so far up your WoW fanboy arse, you just
might get it. But nevermind, go play WoW dude - that world needs you to
save it from all those horrible beasts. Go be all of our hero now!
Hurry along, just be sure that you get to bed on time sonny.
"There's no star system Slave I can't reach, and there's no planet I can't find. There's nowhere in the Galaxy for you to run. Might as well give up now."
Boba Fett
I kinda thought it was pretty funny. I am sure someone took it completely seriously.
I mean, God, have any of you ever been to the WOW forums? Those folks would rant about anything, even something as obviously fake as this.
If even one WOW fanboy was enraged or depressed by this post upon reading it, because they didn't actually read and think for themselves, I think it served it's purpose in the world...
That has to be one of the funniest damn things I have read all year. I actually spit my ice tea I was drinking all over myself, lmfao, too funny!
Oh I don't know, you're the one that seems to be taking this all a bit too seriously. It wasn't funny because it was too obvious. The one about the newspaper that was going on here a few months ago was funny, because even after 5 pages of posts some people where still arguing that it was real. You didn't "get" anyone with this. Better luck next time I guess.
Hehe, well written, intelligent, knowledgeable and funny, we do not see many of thoose around here.
To keep track of the topic.
What kind of insane amount of money do you figure one would have to dish out to get their hands on that license?
Everything has a price, and Blizzard is a corporation after all, so if all the share holders say yes.
Say if it made each and every holder a billionaire?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Jerek_
I wonder if you honestly even believe what you type, or if you live in a made up world of facts.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i fight the battles other fear
EagleRanger