I like your way of thinking

mozis

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little Johnny.

"None, they all fly away with the first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your way of thinking."

Then Little Johnny says, "I have a question for YOU. There are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream. One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, "Well I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."

"The correct answer is the one with the wedding ring on... but I like your way of thinking."

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Died laughing when I first heard this, thought you might enjoy!

Awakened

Lol, good one.

Here's one a guy posted on my guild's web page.

 

A very rich North Carolina man decided that he wanted to throw a party and
invited all of his buddies and neighbors. He also invited Leroy, the only
black man in the neighborhood.

He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion.

Leroy was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating shrimp, oysters and
BBQ.

At the height of the party, the host said, "I have a 10 foot, man-eating
gator in my pool and I'll give a million dollars to anyone who has the
nerve to jump in."

The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash and
everyone turned around and saw Leroy in the pool!

Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its ass! Leroy was jabbing the
gator in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, head butts and choke
holds, biting the gator on the tail and flipping the gator through the air
like some kind of Judo Instructor. The water was churning and splashing
everywhere. Both Leroy and the gator were screaming and raising
hell. Finally Leroy strangled the gator and let it float to the top like
a dime store goldfish.

Leroy then slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was just staring at
him in disbelief.

Finally the host says, "Well, Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million
dollars."

"No, thats okay. I don't want it," said Leroy.

The rich man said, "Man, I have to give you something. You won the bet.

How about half a million bucks then?"


Again Leroy said no. Confused, the rich man asked, "Well, Leroy, then
what
do you want?"

Leroy said, "I want the name of that sumbitch who pushed me in
the pool.

mozis

Haha that is brilliant, very nice

Bababooey

The teacher just got schooled.