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Idiot of the week award
Motorhead
Member UncommonPosts: 1,193
You won't believe what this dude got arrested for...
http://www.wtol.com/Global/story.asp?S=8082496
Quote from the police captain: "Once you think you've seen it all, something else comes around."
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"Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb." -- Batman
Comments
Tough one.... it was his backyard, but he did this multiple times fully nude. I would normally say the proximity to a school should have no merit, but if his backyard was easily viewed from the school or from a sidewalk used by kids then I agree it has major merit. However, what if he had a large privacy fence? In that case, no matter how nude he was, I don't think exposure should be an issue.
The other problem is the fact that he was having sex with a table, and apparently didn't really care if someone happened to see him. Even if he wasn't doing this on display, it raises issues about his mental health. In this instance, I think that separating him from his young children is a very wise move. However, I also think that no one but himself and possibly the police have all the facts required to judge him.
I read about this 2-3 days ago, but I was dying to see the guy that did it. What a nutjob. He even had a wife. I guess the table was better.
-In memory of Laura "Taera" Genender. Passed away on Aug/13/08-
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first case of umbrellaphilia i heard haha
Neighbors need to mind their own business.
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I know. My neighbors leave me alone when I have sex with my picnic table.
I know. My neighbors leave me alone when I have sex with my picnic table.
So let's start arresting everyone that has sex with inanimate objects. Prisons will have a massive overcrowding problem.
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As a side note, it is tough to tell if this is overreaction or not. I know that one of my old schools had a hallway on the second floor with floor to ceiling windows for a good section, and we could see inside all the yards behind the school regardless of having six foot privacy fences.
Wow...I don't really know what to say about this
Your argument is like a two legged dog with an eating disorder...weak and unbalanced.
I guess this really tells when a wife can't preform in bed...At least he didn't cheat
...on a person
__________________________________________________
In memory of Laura "Taera" Genender. Passed away on Aug/13/08 - Rest In Peace; you will not be forgotten
I know. My neighbors leave me alone when I have sex with my picnic table.
So let's start arresting everyone that has sex with inanimate objects. Prisons will have a massive overcrowding problem.
I was actually agreeing with you about them minding their own.
So uhh what are you in for?
...
I had sex with a picnic table..
...
Me too!
..
Wanna be friends?
I can uhh see that on cyanide and happiness
or maybe like one day he's sitting at the kitchen table having sex with a peanut can looking out the window..
at his lovely picnic table
and he's just thinkin
'Ahm gonna fuck me a picnic table before I die
Edit: this guy lives surprisingly close to my house
Trump 2016
Make sure you keep a close watch on your picnic tables...
...you never know what you may wake up to...
Ahh, what a beautiful day! The birds are singing, the sun is shinging, and, hey!!
What the hell is that guy doing to my picnic table?!
__________________________________________________
In memory of Laura "Taera" Genender. Passed away on Aug/13/08 - Rest In Peace; you will not be forgotten
Maybe he was high
or desperately lonely
maybe he could get realdoll to custom make him a picnic table
Trump 2016
When that dude says he's got wood, you'd best believe him.
Grab some wood people...but make certain it has been properly varnished.
If you are not being responded to directly, you are probably on my ignore list.
Sex with the patio furniture? more like splinters in your cock
maybe they arrested him with his pants down and a boner
that would be awesome
Trump 2016
hmmmmm
I would have just posted the video on the net and make sure it got sent as a memo at his workplace.
That would have stopped him mid thrust.
Wait i wouldn't have taped it, in the first place, i would have just started lobbying fireworks blindly at him.
Then when he called the cops, and tries to explain what he was doing would be pricelss.
98% of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you''re one of the 2% who hasn''t, copy & paste this in your signature.
God help me, I hope your joking...
You never know, video taping only takes one hand
__________________________________________________
In memory of Laura "Taera" Genender. Passed away on Aug/13/08 - Rest In Peace; you will not be forgotten
Maybe he was just superstitious?
maybe it was borrowed patio furniture.........
98% of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you''re one of the 2% who hasn''t, copy & paste this in your signature.
I guess one day he woke out of bed and thought to himself:
'You know what, I'm going to fuck a table, yeah that's what I'm going to do'
O_o o_O
How ugly must that guy's wife be
So he meets up in jail with the guy that had sex with a fish in a public place
and he's like you can go to jail for having sex with a fish?
They told me havin sex with a fish was wrong
but it didn't feel wrong jerry it didn't feel wrong
Trump 2016
Honestly I would never have thought anyone would come up with the idea of having sex with a picnic table, that must truly take a creative and desperate mind to come up with. Yet another sex fetish added to the already long list.
I know. My neighbors leave me alone when I have sex with my picnic table.
So let's start arresting everyone that has sex with inanimate objects. Prisons will have a massive overcrowding problem.
indecent exposure within the vicinity of a school is a felony. That's the key here. If he wasn't doing this right by a school he wouldn't have gotten arrested for it.
member of imminst.org
Oh come on guys... the picnic table was askin' for it!!!
At any rate, I certainly hope it was plastic. I also can't help but feel a little envious here. Have you ever seen the size of the holes they put in those tables of umbrellas? Man If my rod was that thick, I'd be in porn movies!
On a more serious note, there's nothing in the article that says he was within view of anyone but his nosey neighbors. The only reason the school is mentioned is because the proximity bumps this up from a misdemeanor to a federal crime. Yes, the guy needs to be publicly humiliated and made to realize that he should, at the very least, roll the table into his house first. On the other hand, sending someone to prison for carnal knowledge with patio furniture seems a little fuckin' steep to me.