Next time she tells you that, just ask her to list a single hobby that she enjoys *and* actively pursues. If all she can list is "music, movies, drinking, and hanging out with friends" then you may as well leave her. Most everyone likes those things to some degree, so she may as well included "eating" or "bathing" as hobbies.
I have an ex that essentially did nothing but work all week so that she could hit the clubs on the weekends. That was her life, and I found it incredibly boring. She couldn't afford to travel with me when I would go on vacation or go kayaking or rock climbing or something. When we were home, she basically needed my attention the whole time. She had no hobbies, no interests. She couldn't just sit back and enjoy a book or watch a movie or something. She either needed me there with her watching the movie, or she'd need to go hang out with her friends (which just means go get drunk). Every single night. It was laughable every time she'd complain about me.
In short, people don't change. If she's complaining about whatever it is you do, then it's best to just string her along for sex until someone better comes along.
First, careful what you wish for, because getting your gf to play mmo's with you is not necessarily the answer. A lot of girls have expectations going into these games and seeing them interact negatively with other players can really shatter your perception of them. In the end they might not 'get' how to socially interact with guilds, etc, and it is important that you do not let that change your opinion of them.
If you do decide to play a game with her start with something easy that neither of you know how to play. If you dominate her in a game or you know everything and are constantly talking and telling her how everything works it takes part of the enjoyment out for her. Let her learn to play on her own; if the game is made for casual players then it will be sufficient to teach her how to play. Let her tell YOU about whats going on, etc. It helps a lot. Also try to tell what she likes about the game and let her spend more time doing that sort of thing. Tell her shes good at that part of the game and you are good at the parts she does not like; sort of like a yin-yang. Find games that she would like based off of what you learn. I know this stuff sounds really basic but as you play and relax you will forget about this advice: you need to remind yourself constantly. Dont get too excited that she is playing with you or it becomes a chore for her because its something she is doing 'for you'.
If you want more freedom and time from your girlfriend to play games then that is something that has less to do with video games and more to do with how much time you spend on your relationship. The activity you want to do alone doesn't really matter; the problem is that she doesn't give you enough alone time If you aren't too attached then maybe just move on. Some girls want a lot of time and some girls very little; it is amazing how variable this is so why try to change someone who probably cannot be changed?
Otherwise, you need to realize that different people show their love differently. Some physically, some by trying to impress their significant other, some do it by wanting to do everything together, some show it by giving out $$ and gifts, some show their love by getting emotional and jealous at a whim. Depending on who you talk to, some of these behaviors can be unhealthy. If you think your girlfriends behaviors are unhealthy but you want to stay with her then you need to be 100% honest, and do it in a non-confrontational, caring, understanding way and work in lots of good things about her as you slowly feed her the bad news that she is f**king crazy. I'd just leave her though, seriously, you will get over it.
Theres also a chance that you are playing way too many video games and ignoring her. But if that is the case you really do not know: She will be telling you this is the case, regardless. You are both biased parties. I'd ask someone else, but they will probably just give you a biased b*ll$h@t answer too. In the end, if you are ignoring her, part of you probably doesnt want to be with her, and you need to be honest with yourself about that. Also start being honest with yourself about how much time you spend gaming or on the computer; write it down. Then browse the web and talk to friends and decide how long you think is acceptable to spend gaming per day and have a serious discussion with her about it.
Originally posted by asmkm22
Next time she tells you that, just ask her to list a single hobby that she enjoys *and* actively pursues. If all she can list is "music, movies, drinking, and hanging out with friends" then you may as well leave her. Most everyone likes those things to some degree, so she may as well included "eating" or "bathing" as hobbies..
+1. Almost totally agree except... A lot of people will either not want to state their hobbies or they think their hobbies are one thing when really they are another. That doesnt make them bad people or anything it just is how it is.
Originally posted by TheScavenger My imaginary gf plays MMOs and a lot of other games with me. But for some reason when we join a larger group for a dungeon or something, no one responds to her at all. No one even lets her have loot or anything. She gets rather annoyed about that.
She sounds like a lot of girl gamers; what a b1#ch.
Originally posted by Edeus
Does your gf not have a job? Are you guys living together? Does she have her own friends?
Oh and a personal note, my girlfriend is awesome she loves games just the right amount. A lot. We like different types of games and I am more into talking about games and game design as opposed to actually playing them but its all good. There are more girls out there like this than OP and others here probably think!!
man i had many many girlfriends most of them hate games and hate me to be playing games but once in a while i get one that gets into it for a couple years when she starts up on you need to grab her pick her up ravage her with afections then when your finished go back to your damn game give her what she wants man then go back to your game or you be one these mofos crying how your women left you over games
I've been playing with my gf in GW2. She's a ranger, i'm a warrior.
She doesn't care how long I spend playing as long as I get my work done. And I do enjoy spending time with her.
"As you read these words, a release is seven days or less away or has just happened within the last seven days those are now the only two states youll find the world of Tyria."...Guild Wars 2
IF you do get her to game with you ( I did ) and she enjoys it ( she does ) DON'T change anything on her hotbars... I took her auto attack symbol off the hotbar while helping her with something... Oh man... Caught some hell for that Lol.
I've been playing with my gf in GW2. She's a ranger, i'm a warrior.
My GF likes GW2 too. I think the heart/dynamic quests help a lot to keep things interesting for girls. Also clicking 'accept quest' I think girls tend to not like that whole concept. Guys probably don't either really it is rather dumb.
The nice thing about GW2 is it can be pretty complex combat-wise if you want to look into (for the guy). If you have a more casual player (the girl) they can just button mash and help each other when you are in a down state it makes you feel like you are sharing something together.
Me being a girl, I can say when my Fiancee is playing a game I don't like, it kinda bothers me rofl. However, im a gamer as well, be we like different types of games. He is into a lot of RTS games like Starcraft. I don't actually stop him from playing his RTS games though. Him and I have been looking for a game to play together. So far we been playing TERA Online mostly.
Oh also I want to point this out because I saw someone talk about the clothing in TERA. I hardly see it as a problem. I think the Elin are cute. I will say, I am a pretty big anime fan though. So im kinda used to it. I think the people who talk about pedo crap and such just because of a game with a fictional character is just plain being rediculous.
My cat would probably have a better chance at getting into MMO's then my girlfriend.
Little Big Planet and Super Mario are hard enough for her as it is, not joking btw.
Haha yeah same here....Even farmville was too hard for her.......It would be nice to have a mate to game with but they are rare.
Platformers are hard to keep up in. Ya'll should show your girlfriends gw2 or something where they can just mash btns if they want and they can keep up with you.
Comments
Next time she tells you that, just ask her to list a single hobby that she enjoys *and* actively pursues. If all she can list is "music, movies, drinking, and hanging out with friends" then you may as well leave her. Most everyone likes those things to some degree, so she may as well included "eating" or "bathing" as hobbies.
I have an ex that essentially did nothing but work all week so that she could hit the clubs on the weekends. That was her life, and I found it incredibly boring. She couldn't afford to travel with me when I would go on vacation or go kayaking or rock climbing or something. When we were home, she basically needed my attention the whole time. She had no hobbies, no interests. She couldn't just sit back and enjoy a book or watch a movie or something. She either needed me there with her watching the movie, or she'd need to go hang out with her friends (which just means go get drunk). Every single night. It was laughable every time she'd complain about me.
In short, people don't change. If she's complaining about whatever it is you do, then it's best to just string her along for sex until someone better comes along.
You make me like charity
First, careful what you wish for, because getting your gf to play mmo's with you is not necessarily the answer. A lot of girls have expectations going into these games and seeing them interact negatively with other players can really shatter your perception of them. In the end they might not 'get' how to socially interact with guilds, etc, and it is important that you do not let that change your opinion of them.
If you do decide to play a game with her start with something easy that neither of you know how to play. If you dominate her in a game or you know everything and are constantly talking and telling her how everything works it takes part of the enjoyment out for her. Let her learn to play on her own; if the game is made for casual players then it will be sufficient to teach her how to play. Let her tell YOU about whats going on, etc. It helps a lot. Also try to tell what she likes about the game and let her spend more time doing that sort of thing. Tell her shes good at that part of the game and you are good at the parts she does not like; sort of like a yin-yang. Find games that she would like based off of what you learn. I know this stuff sounds really basic but as you play and relax you will forget about this advice: you need to remind yourself constantly. Dont get too excited that she is playing with you or it becomes a chore for her because its something she is doing 'for you'.
If you want more freedom and time from your girlfriend to play games then that is something that has less to do with video games and more to do with how much time you spend on your relationship. The activity you want to do alone doesn't really matter; the problem is that she doesn't give you enough alone time If you aren't too attached then maybe just move on. Some girls want a lot of time and some girls very little; it is amazing how variable this is so why try to change someone who probably cannot be changed?
Otherwise, you need to realize that different people show their love differently. Some physically, some by trying to impress their significant other, some do it by wanting to do everything together, some show it by giving out $$ and gifts, some show their love by getting emotional and jealous at a whim. Depending on who you talk to, some of these behaviors can be unhealthy. If you think your girlfriends behaviors are unhealthy but you want to stay with her then you need to be 100% honest, and do it in a non-confrontational, caring, understanding way and work in lots of good things about her as you slowly feed her the bad news that she is f**king crazy. I'd just leave her though, seriously, you will get over it.
Theres also a chance that you are playing way too many video games and ignoring her. But if that is the case you really do not know: She will be telling you this is the case, regardless. You are both biased parties. I'd ask someone else, but they will probably just give you a biased b*ll$h@t answer too. In the end, if you are ignoring her, part of you probably doesnt want to be with her, and you need to be honest with yourself about that. Also start being honest with yourself about how much time you spend gaming or on the computer; write it down. Then browse the web and talk to friends and decide how long you think is acceptable to spend gaming per day and have a serious discussion with her about it.
+1. Almost totally agree except... A lot of people will either not want to state their hobbies or they think their hobbies are one thing when really they are another. That doesnt make them bad people or anything it just is how it is.
She sounds like a lot of girl gamers; what a b1#ch.
+1
+1
Play as your fav retro characters: cnd-online.net. My site: www.lysle.net. Blog: creatingaworld.blogspot.com.
Play as your fav retro characters: cnd-online.net. My site: www.lysle.net. Blog: creatingaworld.blogspot.com.
man i had many many girlfriends most of them hate games and hate me to be playing games but once in a while i get one that gets into it for a couple years when she starts up on you need to grab her pick her up ravage her with afections then when your finished go back to your damn game give her what she wants man then go back to your game or you be one these mofos crying how your women left you over games
I've been playing with my gf in GW2. She's a ranger, i'm a warrior.
She doesn't care how long I spend playing as long as I get my work done. And I do enjoy spending time with her.
"As you read these words, a release is seven days or less away or has just happened within the last seven days those are now the only two states youll find the world of Tyria."...Guild Wars 2
Sharess Dragonstar - Midgard
Grievance is recruiting.
My GF likes GW2 too. I think the heart/dynamic quests help a lot to keep things interesting for girls. Also clicking 'accept quest' I think girls tend to not like that whole concept. Guys probably don't either really it is rather dumb.
The nice thing about GW2 is it can be pretty complex combat-wise if you want to look into (for the guy). If you have a more casual player (the girl) they can just button mash and help each other when you are in a down state it makes you feel like you are sharing something together.
Play as your fav retro characters: cnd-online.net. My site: www.lysle.net. Blog: creatingaworld.blogspot.com.
Me being a girl, I can say when my Fiancee is playing a game I don't like, it kinda bothers me rofl. However, im a gamer as well, be we like different types of games. He is into a lot of RTS games like Starcraft. I don't actually stop him from playing his RTS games though. Him and I have been looking for a game to play together. So far we been playing TERA Online mostly.
Oh also I want to point this out because I saw someone talk about the clothing in TERA. I hardly see it as a problem. I think the Elin are cute. I will say, I am a pretty big anime fan though. So im kinda used to it. I think the people who talk about pedo crap and such just because of a game with a fictional character is just plain being rediculous.
Haha yeah same here....Even farmville was too hard for her.......It would be nice to have a mate to game with but they are rare.
Naaa, they are not rare. Just many guys tend to not look good enough :P.
Platformers are hard to keep up in. Ya'll should show your girlfriends gw2 or something where they can just mash btns if they want and they can keep up with you.
Play as your fav retro characters: cnd-online.net. My site: www.lysle.net. Blog: creatingaworld.blogspot.com.