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Are my parents legally allowed to take something i paid for?
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No, It only goes the one way and here is why:
He didn't decide to be born; she made that decision for him. He didn't decide who should be his guardians; she made that decision for him. He didn't decide how he was going to be raised; she made those decisions for him.
She has been there all his life guiding him along. She is the person most responsible for his development.
No, she didn't ask for him to be her child, since to ask, implies that there is a choice to be made - he had no choice - she dictated it.
Oh grow up already. Its funny how everyone on here who said "You don't have to take that!" also told a little story of how thier parents abused them.
All he asked was if his mom could take his computer. The answer is yes. He doesn't need all these people telling that his parents have to show him respect. He'll get the respect he deserves when he earns. You don't get to demand respect from your parents. But, since they brought you into this world and made sure you had a place to live, food to eat, and clothes to wear they have every right to demand respect from you.
Just makes me mad that kids these days think they can tell thier parents what to do. If I tried to treat my parents like some of you suggest my dad would have knocked me on my ass. I tell my kids the same thing, followed by the simple warning that I won't tolerate it either.
Are you addressing me with this post or did you miss click?
I don't see any relation between what I typed and what you replied...
"The liberties and resulting economic prosperity that YOU take for granted were granted by those "dead guys"
OP, since the question has been answered on if your parents can remove your property and has switched to advice I'll give some of my own.
You have two choices:
1: At like a immature, irrational person getting into one shouting match after another with your mother...it appears you've already taken this route, which effectively places you in the same category you see your mom in...so neither of you are able to act like adults..smooth.
2:Act like a mature, rational person and address your mother and what she may or may not have done with some tact and reason, sit down like and adult who is talking like an adult....which may be impossible now considering the approach you did with the computer.
Mom calling your manager?= Non-issue, she had your back on that one...unless making more money isn't something you enjoy...she made a verbal agreement that you would be there and yes for you to not show up would put her in a bad situation...if you are unable to see that..well i don't know what to say.
Since we don't know how much time you place on the computer it's extremely hard to say one way or the other if she was right by taking it...but i think it's reasonable to assume that it's been a problem in the past...why even bother packing it up if it wasn't?
Your a Senior in High School, more importantly your a man.....it's time to start acting like one.
He's 17 and he has a job.
That makes him a legal adult where I live, not to mention a young adult already capable of taking on financial responsabilities.
17 is exactly the sort of age I would expect friction of this nature between a parent and their child. The line between child and adult is pretty fuzzy at this point, and if she hasn't had teenage kids before his mum will be in no better a position to judge it than he.
I guess I'm the odd one out here, but what his mother did was pretty underhanded. She should've never gone behind his back and promised his boss that the OP would work more.
Obviously there is a lot more going on than what the OP has said. But based on what he's said, his mother is not acting like an adult at all. Punishing a child because they won't work overtime is disgusting and borderline involuntary servitude. Even if his reason for not working overtime was because he wanted to play on his computer, it's still a valid reason (assuming his grades aren't suffering because of gaming).
I'd like to know what wonderful magical world some of you lived in when you were teenagers and your parents would actually sit down and speak to you like an adult if you wanted it. Mine certainly didn't until I left home. As adults, it's easier for us to say "start acting like an adult," but when there is no respect given in the first place and it's a completely one-sided give and take relationship, it's impossible to do so while you're still living with them.
OP, your mother is in her right to take your stuff as long as you eat her food and live in her house. So leave. Or if you stay, know that you'll be fighting quite a bit to keep her from whoring you out to your boss whenever she wants to. Life is about a trade-off... security and servitude or freedom and the stress of supporting yourself. Yes, what she did was unfair. But you either stay for your own reasons or leave for your own reasons. You're old enough to make those choices.
He's 17 and he has a job.
That makes him a legal adult where I live, not to mention a young adult already capable of taking on financial responsabilities.
17 is exactly the sort of age I would expect friction of this nature between a parent and their child. The line between child and adult is pretty fuzzy at this point, and if she hasn't had teenage kids before his mum will be in no better a position to judge it than he.
If he dosent like it then he needs to Move out. Its his parents Rule and their house. He can never be a room mate with his Mom He can Only be a Kid aslong as he is in her house.
Now Flip this In 20 years My mother needs to move in with me then She will be under my care and Rules. Its my house after all. Will I make her do chores? Heck no she will be 70. But there needs to be a healthy respect from Both parent and Child In order for both to be in the same house after a Certin point.
The OP is clearly at the point where he needs to make a Choice. One he can Obey his Mothers Rule Or Two he can move out to the real world. You cant be a Adult In Moms House. It aint gana happen.
Edit: Just one more thing. In the case of your Mom saying yes you would come in SHE was in the wrong. You Do need to have a calm talk about this and make sure she dosent say you will work with out your consent.
If ye love wealth greater than liberty, the tranquility of servitude; greater than the animating contest for freedom, go home from us in peace. We seek not your counsel, nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you; May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen.
Samuel Adams
Lol of course they are not.
But what they can do is to kick you, and your computer out of the house, they are fully entitled to do that.
Also do you pay for the electricity bills, or the internet connection?
Just because you work that doesn't mean you can do whatever you like in your parents home.
Although I agree that your mum should stay out of your personal life, but remember, if you really want to be indipendent rent a flat and go and live by yourself, and stop moaning about your folks.
Its curious to me that alot of people term what she did regarding work to be "encouraging him to work" or other such euphemisms. No, she made a decision about his work schedule without consulting him. She should have said "I don't know, I'll have to ask him to call you back on that." The idea that my mother would do something like that is practically inconceivable; she would have never presume to say when I would or wouldn't work. When I was younger and working at a grocery store if my manager asked for me to come in and I wasn't around, my mother would simply as me to call in to give an answer. That is the appropriate action.
If you are not being responded to directly, you are probably on my ignore list.
Without knowing your work ethic... I will say this your mother is fully within her rights to do whatever she wants in her household. You are not free to decide for yourself until you become an adult living on your own dime, and then you are subject to the rules of society, your job, your significant other. If your mom thinks you're lazy and should go to work because you're spending too much time on the PC, you probably are. If you're moaning about a tough day at driving school... I think I agree with her.
lol this is the wrong place to ask for advice. Eitherway this thread provides entertainment.
my advise is to respect your mother and dont argue with her. simple as that.
good thing my mother isn't like that at all...
anyway, they have every right because you are under their house, eating the food on their table, your computer uses their electricity, drinking the water from their faucet, etc. besides, she won't do it unless she didn't see that you are really indulging yourself too much on your computer. you don't have the energy to wrk but you do have an energy to argue with her over your pc... but still, i think she did tell that to your manager because she wants to show how "eager" and "hard-working" you are...
My parents generally stay out of my affairs, generally because I make it very irritating for them if they bother me, amongst other reasons
But yes, I think your parents can take your stuff "legally." I'm in the same boat with you as generally when I get bad grades or something my parents look for something to take, at which point I just find an alternative thing to do.